I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
