so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize