I skipped work to stalk him.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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