That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
