How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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