Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
