i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
