She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
