yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
