we're blogging at a bar
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
My vagina is very pro this idea
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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