Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
