I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.