38 yer olds are good kisserssss
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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