Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
