i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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