Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
