There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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