how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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