scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???