She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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