im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize