I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize