Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
