i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
