Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize