do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park