the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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