why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
