playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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