sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
