Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
