I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize