Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize