Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize