Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Someone signed my nipple.
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