so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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