i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
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He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
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Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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