Is it normal to miss your booty call?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
