Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
