I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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