: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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