Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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