we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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