your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
