I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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