oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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