the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize