Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
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I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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