At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
