so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
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Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
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I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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