is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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